talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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