I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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