so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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