I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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