And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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