NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
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