When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
