dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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