We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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