After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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