I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize