The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
