Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
