do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
