I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize