I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?