So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
This house was built for laser tag.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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