Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
