The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize