some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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