Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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