I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
