the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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