Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
