She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
