my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
My vagina just recognized that song.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Randomize
