so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
