I want to make a zoo with you.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
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so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
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Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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