When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize