Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I intend to get homeless drunk
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I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
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All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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