also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize