my phone cant type all the emotion im having
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
