haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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