Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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