Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
