even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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