You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
