Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
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