That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize