Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
A bitchslap is in order.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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