i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I have already put on my inside pants.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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