porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself