I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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