no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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