Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize