Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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