we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
my being single is dangerous.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
