my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize