Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.

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(248): View more from Michigan

you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits

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(515): View more from Iowa

Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.

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(623): View more from Arizona

I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.

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(713): View more from Texas

WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!

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(770): View more from Georgia

I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.

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(561): View more from Florida

I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it

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(219): View more from Indiana

The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.

(928): View more from Arizona

I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.

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