I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
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I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
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With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?