i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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